Fic: Monday
Aug. 4th, 2011 05:01 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
meridian_roseTitle: Monday
Fandom: original fic
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 282
Prompt: For the 30 days of fiction meme Prompt #23 falling
Summary: A Stream of consciousness fic told via a diary entry
Warnings: None
Notes: Somewhat romantic in tone; another piece that's out of my comfort zone, which I suppose is the point of the prompts :D
Monday
I don't know what to do…this isn't me. We spent the whole weekend together. Except for when he left me alone to take a long bath and made dinner for us. And the two hours he was happy for me to check my email and blog posts while he checked his own email and started on the crossword. Like we're an actual couple…and we're not…but still…
I feel unbalanced, the way he constantly surprises me….the way he makes me giddy.
I don't want to be giddy. I'm a grown woman. Sensible. Rational.
I'm not about to let my heart rule my head.
Not about the things that matter. I am who I am, I want what I want, I believe what I believe. He can't change those things about me.
He says he doesn't want to.
He laughs at all my fears and concerns, and then he looks solemn when I glare and he says he isn't mocking, honestly, it's just that I think too much, that I overthink everything and we ought to just enjoy things.
And I would, except he could change me, maybe. I don’t like how I let down my guard around him. He's got past all my defences somehow. I ought to have been paying better attention.
And sometimes he kisses me and the world drops away. And it's wonderful and liberating.
And terrifying.
I worry I could lose myself, my secure footing, my certainties.
It's like…like falling. Like stepping off the edge and plummeting towards the ground and wondering if you have wings to soar with, or if you're going to hit the bottom and get hurt.
I suppose that's why it's called falling in love.
Fandom: original fic
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 282
Prompt: For the 30 days of fiction meme Prompt #23 falling
Summary: A Stream of consciousness fic told via a diary entry
Warnings: None
Notes: Somewhat romantic in tone; another piece that's out of my comfort zone, which I suppose is the point of the prompts :D
Monday
I don't know what to do…this isn't me. We spent the whole weekend together. Except for when he left me alone to take a long bath and made dinner for us. And the two hours he was happy for me to check my email and blog posts while he checked his own email and started on the crossword. Like we're an actual couple…and we're not…but still…
I feel unbalanced, the way he constantly surprises me….the way he makes me giddy.
I don't want to be giddy. I'm a grown woman. Sensible. Rational.
I'm not about to let my heart rule my head.
Not about the things that matter. I am who I am, I want what I want, I believe what I believe. He can't change those things about me.
He says he doesn't want to.
He laughs at all my fears and concerns, and then he looks solemn when I glare and he says he isn't mocking, honestly, it's just that I think too much, that I overthink everything and we ought to just enjoy things.
And I would, except he could change me, maybe. I don’t like how I let down my guard around him. He's got past all my defences somehow. I ought to have been paying better attention.
And sometimes he kisses me and the world drops away. And it's wonderful and liberating.
And terrifying.
I worry I could lose myself, my secure footing, my certainties.
It's like…like falling. Like stepping off the edge and plummeting towards the ground and wondering if you have wings to soar with, or if you're going to hit the bottom and get hurt.
I suppose that's why it's called falling in love.
no subject
Date: 2011-08-04 05:33 pm (UTC)This is just so sweet, with the falling in love and the uncertainty...
One thing: He can't change those things about be. 'me'?
no subject
Date: 2011-08-04 06:01 pm (UTC)Yes, it should. Good catch, thank you :D
no subject
Date: 2011-08-07 12:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-08-07 08:32 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-08-04 08:44 pm (UTC)ooooor something like that 0:) :
*sigh again*
"I don’t like how I let down my guard around him. He's got past all my defences somehow. I ought to have been paying better attention.
And sometimes he kisses me and the world drops away. And it's wonderful and liberating."
*sigh*
no subject
Date: 2011-08-05 11:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-08-16 11:34 am (UTC)You should try it more often. ;)
no subject
Date: 2011-08-05 10:14 am (UTC)And the last line is perfect! :D
no subject
Date: 2011-08-05 11:04 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-08-09 08:11 pm (UTC)Great job!
no subject
Date: 2011-08-09 09:31 pm (UTC)