Oh that is such a lot *hugs* and I can sympathise from very similar experiences.

friends: "Remember that we are always here for you if you ever need us!"
me: ::begs for a shoulder to cry on when I'm having a bad day::
friends: "Sorry I'm really busy and you're being kind of a downer right now anyway and you are perfectly capable of dealing with this on your own. We believe in you!"
This so much. one minute they're venting about their family and reblogging "This blog is a safe place, talk to me if you need to" and then next it's "ugh stop being sad and writing dark fics" :/

There's no one way or thing that helps except time, other things vary, but sometimes knowing someone is listening is important and it's hurtful when the people you trust turn on your like that and pull the "just do better" thing.

Thanks for reading and sharing your own experiences, it makes me feel less alone!